November 8, 2011

Dear Mr. Disposable Diaper...

Dear Mr. Disposable Diaper,

I regret to inform you that after exclusively breastfeeding two infants, your performance rating regarding spillage is rather poor. For being the popular means of diapering in America I would think that you should be able to contain my baby’s slippery breastfed disposals, however, that is not the case. Why just this morning my poor daughter was awakened from her morning nap because you failed to contain her massive amount of poo. If I had known this was going to happen I would have hurried cleaning her stash of fluff.

I think that you should take a note from your competitor, the beautiful and rather clean Miss Cloth Diaper. While many parents are on the fence in regards to using her method of diapering on their babies, I have found that she has contained both of my babies’ breastfed poops. Naturally, she does have errors here and there with leaking. It’s rare though and especially rare when it comes to bodily waste.

Rather than trying to mask yourself in Miss Cloth Diaper’s clothes by acquiring adorable prints, you must come face to face with reality: You are not as good as she is. You never were and never will be. Please stop trying to pose as her as you’re only humiliating yourself.

Sincerely,
A Devoted Miss Cloth Diaper User

2 comments:

Love this! I giggled a little! ;-)

xo,
A

You are saying what i am thinking everyday!!!